MISS WHEATON'S WHISKERS has been officially out for one week now. Yay! What fun it's been to make this story available. The next few weeks she's only available on Kindle, but soon she'll venture into other formats.

For now, here is a tasty little snippet in case you're curious what the sneaky little miss is all about:

"You weave an attractive packet of lies, Miss," the man said at last.

"You call me a liar?"

"A storyteller, perhaps. But it makes no difference to me. I'm happy to stomach the whole of it—drunken brother, ailing mother, destitute siblings. Certainly it is more than enough to explain your hasty engagement. And far more entertaining than whatever true reason there must be."

"Why should I need a reason to give my consent to any reasonable man?" she asked. "Just who are you to be my judge?"

"Ah, so now you are interested in me, are you? Perhaps I wish to keep my identity secret just as much as you do."

"It makes no matter to me, I assure you. I simply wondered, since you seem to think you are somebody. Are you? Do you have a name?"

"John," he said, after a pause. "That is my name."

"Ah, well that answers everything," she declared.

He gave her his first name and nothing more? Now what on earth was she supposed to do with that? It wasn't as if she'd go around calling him by it. Certainly not! And John was quite an ordinary name. He could still be anyone and she'd never guess it.

"Just John? I'm surprised. You seem to think of yourself overly high, Just John. Isn't there a Mister or a Sir with that? How should I call you?"

Now he turned just enough to meet her eyes with his own. They were a deep, deep blue that hinted at night time. "I am pleased to know you wish to call me at all."

The Truth about Bamboozling

"He is a fine fellow," said Mr. Bennet, as soon as they were out of the house, "as ever I saw. He simpers, and smirks, and makes love to us all. I am prodigiously proud of him."

Mr. Bennet, of course, was not being honest. Anyone who has ever read Jane Austen's PRIDE AND PREJUDICE knows that he is speaking here of Mr. Wickham, one of the greatest liars and petty scoundrels of Regency fiction. Oh, how we love the duplicitous George Wickham and his half-truths and misinformation!

But Mr. Wickham had no monopoly on lies. Language of that era is peppered with various colorful terms and phrases to refer to the wondrous art of deception. Why would I be so familiar with these words? Because I have a pretty little liar of my own in my upcoming release, MISS WHEATON'S WHISKERS.

And no, she's not a bearded lady. A "whisker" is Regency vernacular for "lie". Of the little white variety. And boy does Miss Wheaton tell them! All for a good cause, of course. She's really got the best of intentions, you know. But I'll blog about that on another day.

Today it's all about clankers, gabble, and making May-game of some poor humbugged gull.

If you were to tell a Banbury tale, you'd be bouncing or fibbing. It would hardly be enough to put you in a bumble-broth, but a simple bit of funning. Too much bibble-babble, though, would certainly get you called maggoty or even havey-cavey. To pull a chouse on the nearest gudgeon would clearly label you Jackanapes, and pulling a kickshaw rig would make you quite the saucebox. It might cause a row and you'd have to talk the hind leg off a dog to get out of a fair wigging.

Now, don't go thinking all this twadle is just fimble-famble or some old mare's nest. I'm certainly no quiz, and that's not just puffing and folderol. I've no need for rodomontrade. I'd be a sharp and a sly-boots if I let you believe that diddling gammon.

But let me twit you a bit with this poser: is it better to bam or to banger or outright fudge than to sham by embroidery and old Spanish coin? Plumper and rot, my good friends! Such colorful phrases are little more than piffle and flapdoodle, of course.

Now that I've bemused and bedazzled you all with my literary gew-gaws, no doubt you've taken the nacky notion I must clearly be a wicked dissembler of the worst sort. Fustian, I say! Don't be up on your high ropes. Call me a peach, but I'll spill the soup on you all. I've no doubt every one of us has sprouted a few whiskers here and there.

Now I dare you to cry tarradiddle!

Contest: Your Favorite Reading Spot

I love books that are set in far away places. Regency England is my favorite location--it's geographically half a continent and one whole ocean away from Ohio, plus it's 200 years in the past. That's pretty far away. But gosh, do I love being whisked off to that magical land of fancy gowns, country gardens, quieter times, and gentlemen in cravats. Sigh.

Yes, I have strong opinions of where I like to read about. But what about where I like to actually read? Does that make a difference?

I've got noisy kids, rambunctious dogs, invasive cats, and a house with a very open floor plan. So yes, I've learned that where to read a good book does indeed make a difference. Let me share with you a bit of what my efforts have uncovered:

Can I enjoy a book if I read it at my desk? No. Because A) this is where I know I should be working, and B) there is way too much pouncing at my desk.




Can I enjoy a book if I read it in my bed? No. Because Someone (ahem, Lulu) likes to crowd me out of my spot.

So where does a girl have to go to get some alone time?

Okay. Not my first choice.

Here's where I'd rather curl up to read a good book.

How about you? Do you have a favorite place to read a good book? Does where you read have anything to do with how much you enjoy the book?


I'll be doing some give-aways over the next couple weeks. In honor of this long weekend here in the US, I'm giving away four copies of my upcoming release, PASSION AND PRETENSE. If you love light-hearted Regency Romance with a little mystery, let me know where you like to read. Tell me about your favorite reading spot and I'll put your name in the drawing. On President's Day, Feb. 20th, I'll select four lucky winners. (International readers are welcome to enter!)

Okay, now it gets better:
If you send me a photo of you reading one of my books in a favorite (or dreadful!) reading spot, I'll put your name in for a bigger drawing and you can win a gift card for either Barnes & Noble OR for Amazon/Kindle along with your free copy of PASSION AND PRETENSE! That winner will be announced on release day, March 6, 2012.

Photos can be posted to my Facebook page or emailed to susan.heino@gmail.com. The only stipulation is that you let me post your photo on my blog and/or my social media. Okay? So make sure you comb your hair!

PASSION AND PRETENSE

March 6, 2012. That's when PASSION AND PRETENSE officially releases into the wild. Well, into bookstores and e-readers, at least.

I really love this story and I've been impatiently waiting to share it. I'm gearing up to do a blog tour and some fun give-aways, etc., but I'll just have to tease you a bit while I firm up the details. Meanwhile, keep your eyes open for more, because what begins as Pretense might have a way of ending in Passion!

Miss Penelope Rastmoor has always been a bit of a troublemaker. Determined to thwart her brother's plans to get her properly married, she decides what she needs is the most horrible, unsuitable fiancé ever imagined. Unfortunately, she never quite imagined Lord Harry!

Lord Harry Chesterton has his own reasons for agreeing to Penelope's scheme. A man's life hangs in the balance and Lord Harry needs what Penelope has—a mysterious Egyptian scarab. Yes, he'll pose as her unsuitable fiancé and he'll get his hands on her scarab. But will he be content with that, or will Lord Harry end up stealing something more precious?

An excerpt:

He held her tightly, pressing her against him to feel every inch of her tantalizing curves. His mouth took possession of hers, her sweetness and willingness fueling a desire that was wholly unexpected. He knew, of course, kissing Miss Rastmoor would be pleasurable. He never dreamed it would be so overwhelming.

"It would appear Miss Rastmoor is good at a few things, as well," he said, coming up for air.

She, too, was catching her breath. Her huge blue eyes blinked up at him. "Heavens, but you're even more wicked than everyone says you are!"

"Now don't act quite so righteous, my dear. You seem to be someone who rather likes wicked."

"But my brother doesn't. He is absolutely going to hate you."

He didn't much care for the sound of that. "I thought you said he wasn't here?"

"He's not, but once he finds out we've become engaged, he'll boil over like a scalded pot. Oh, he'll be furious."

Harris shoved her away as if she'd suddenly become scalding herself. "Now wait one little minute here!"

"No, no, it's no reason to panic," she said, shushing him as if she expected him to stand here and discuss this with her. "I'm not trying to trap you, or anything."

"It sure as hell seems that way," he said, scanning for the quickest, darkest way out of the garden. "Damn it, woman, did you think by luring me into a few stolen kisses I'd feel compelled to drop down on my knee and offer for you?"

She stood up very straight and jabbed her pointy little chin into the air. "I don't recall luring you at all, sir. Besides, I've heard your uncle has pulled the rug out from under your finances until you get a proper wife."

"And you'd like to apply for the job?"

"Heavens, no! It's just that I'm in somewhat the same situation, you see."

He really had no idea where this was going, but damned if he wasn't intrigued. What the hell was this minx up to?

"You need a proper wife?" he asked.

"No. I need a proper fiancé," she replied. "Or rather, a very improper one."

Newsletter -- July 2011

TEMPTRESS IN TRAINING has hit the shelves! I'm so excited to finally give Sophie Darshaw her happily ever after. And have you seen the beautiful cover? Sophie and Lindley are pretty special to me, and I hope readers love their story. Can I tempt you a bit?

Sophie Darshaw has earned her keep in Madame Eudora's brothel by sewing unique and intimate articles for Madame's particular clients. But Sophie dreams of a better life and embarks on a scheme to make herself respectable. She ends up privy to a murder plot and in possession of a mysterious locket that may hold the key to her father’s life—or death.

Lord Lindley lost his family when a plot by some Napoleon sympathizers went awry. It has been his life’s goal ever since to bring these men to justice. He’s been stalking one man in particular—Philip Darshaw. Lindley's determined to learn just how much of her father’s criminal past Sophie has been involved in. He'll stop at nothing to get what he wants from the secretive seamstress. Sophie's creative stitchery, however, might just unravel his plans.

And yet another Happily Ever After!
Several, actually. I'm honored to have a short story in a really fun anthology put together by Fiction Flurry, a group of writers from my own hometown. It's called Tales of Summer Romance and it's full of short little stories about--you guessed it--summer romance. It's available at Smashwords and a portion of the proceeds will go to a community-based charity. Here's the link if you'd like to check it out: http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/69671

What's next?
PASSION AND PRETENSE will be my next release, scheduled for April, 2011. It follows the story of Lord Rastmoor's little sister, Penelope. She's grown up a bit, but still the same unconventional mischief-maker we came to love in DAMSEL IN DISGUISE. Originally this book was to be called PARAMOUR BY PRETENSE, but the marketing department asked me to come up with something a little sexier, so I did.

MISTRESS and DAMSEL are still out there making appearances at local booksellers. If you've missed MISTRESS BY MISTAKE or DAMSEL IN DISGUISE, check with your local bookstore, library, or look for them online at Amazon.com and the usual places.

RWA National Conference
I've been making some appearances, too! I just got back from the Romance Writers of America national conference where I participated in the annual booksigning to benefit literacy. Also, my publisher held a free booksigning open only to conference attendees. What a blast to sign books and give them out for free!

This year's conference was in exciting New York City. Wow, this was my first time in the Big Apple and I loved it! That place really doesn't sleep--and I don't think I did, either. But I came back all full of plans and ideas for what to write next so I'm raring to go. Even with all the changes in the industry, my agent and editor were very upbeat and excited.

While there, I was privileged to be a part of two Author Workshop Panels. With authors Courtney Milan, Kris Kennedy, Susan Sey and Tiffany Clare we discussed The Seven Deadly Sins of the First Book. Great insights for new authors! With Kit Wilkinson, Lynette Eason, and Christie Craig, we discussed Riding the Contest Wave; how to make writing contests work for you. Good stuff!

Upcoming Events
In August I'll be making several appearances here in Ohio. I'd love to see you if you can drop by!

Wednesday, Aug. 3, 12:00 - 3:00 pm
Guest Speaker, Cambridge Writers Group
Crossroads Library
63500 Byesville Road
Cambridge, OH

Saturday, Aug. 13, 2:00 - 4:00 pm
Booksigning (with author Donna MacMeans)
Barnes & Noble, Easton Town Center
4005 Townsfair Way
Columbus, OH 43219

Saturday, Aug. 20, 11:30 am - 1:00 pm
"World Building for Writers" Author Panel
Buckeye Library
6625 Wolff Road
Medina, OH 44256

Teasing you with my Temptress!

I cannot believe how quickly June is zooming by! In less than three weeks my next book, TEMPTRESS IN TRAINING, will hit the shelves. Woo hoo! I'm so excited to introduce Sophie Darshaw to readers. At last!

Sophie is the poor, long lost cousin we heard about but never met in MISTRESS BY MISTAKE. In the opening chapters of DAMSEL IN DISGUISE she makes a brief appearance, but then mysteriously disappears. Finally now we can find out what the gal has been up to. And who she's been up to it with!

To tease you just a bit, here's a little excerpt:

“Lord Lindley, please,” she began, moving toward him, then stopping just out of arms reach. “You cannot take him. Not now.”
“You don’t know what he’s done, Miss Darshaw.”
“But I know what will happen if he does not see a doctor right away.”
“He’s wounded; nothing more. He’ll survive.”
“But the blood . . . please, have some compassion.”
She was so earnest it was all he could do to deny her. Her helpless, desperate eyes searched his. His resolve returned, however, as soon as he recalled another pair of helpless, desperate eyes that had begged him for rescue. Rescue he could not give. Those eyes had shut and never opened again and Lindley had finally caught the man responsible for it. Damn it, but Lindley couldn’t let himself be weak now. Four souls left in the cold ground of his family plot needed justice. They would get it.
“My compassion is buried with my family, back in Kent,” he informed her.
She must have recognized the icy reality of this on his face. She took a step backward, away from him. The glow from the lamp hanging near the doorway spilled out into the yard where they stood. The warm light played against the heavy shadows, making her eyes seem endlessly deep and her skin endlessly tempting. Emotion only allowed her to draw short, halting breaths. Her worn gown pulled against those unignorable curves. Hellfire, why couldn’t he forget just for these moments how beautiful the girl was?
“Maybe you can’t feel compassion, but surely you can feel something,” she said, swallowed, and gave the tiniest hint of a smile. “You are, after all, a man.”
Oh, he felt something, indeed. “My feelings are hardly your concern, Miss Darshaw. Go back inside and say farewell.”

Let Your Flag Fly

Today is Flag Day here in the US. I had to go online and look it up when my daughter said, "Flag Day? What's that?"

Here's what I found. In 1777, the Second Continental Congress passed a resolution adopting the flag. You know, the original Stars and Stripes with the stars in a circle instead of all jammed into off-set rows because they had a lot fewer states to recognize back then. But apparently Flag Day wasn't much of a big deal to most people.

It sounds like throughout the 1800's various towns and communities celebrated the anniversary of the flag's adoption in a variety of ways, but it sounds like it was kind of sporatic. In 1916, President Woodrow Wilson was the first one to give it national attention by signing a proclamation that officially made today, June 14, Flag Day. It wasn't until August of 1949 that politicians gave it full attention by passing an Act of Congress to establish it.

But why? What's the big deal about a flag? I thought I'd better look that up, too.
I found some conflicting stuff. I found references to stars representing the 13 original colonies, but also representing the heavens and the Divine intervention that brought our nation into being, as well as the Divine call on the people themselves to be something special. The stripes can represent rays from the sun, beaming down on the land to produce prosperity and enlightenment, or they could have something to do with the Biblical reference to Christ's "stripes", or wounds that rescue us from sin. The red could be a nod to the bloodshed of war, and probably means victory through suffering or hardship while the white is likely purity and freedom. The blue represents the heavens, and maybe justice and perseverance.

Basically, everyone has some opinion as to what the flag stands for, and it's all pretty good stuff. None of the references I found indicated that blue stood for Greed or white meant Dirty Politics while red stripes remind us of our Trillion Dollar National Debt. No, that's not why we fly our flags.

We choose to see the American flag as something better. It is a symbol of our hopes and our dreams, not our failures and our shortcomings. We proudly fly our flags in honor of great men and women who have sacrificed and done noble things, not for those who cheat and steal. The flag stands for military personnel, civilians, lawmakers, homemakers, first responders, the elderly, and school children who all do their part to uphold freedom, equality, kindness, creativity, independence, excellence, and justice for all. Yes, that should be all of us. The flag represents what all of us could be.

So, now I can explain to my daughter what Flag Day is. It is a day we honor this simple piece of fabric as a symbol for some really big ideas. Some great ideas. Sure, maybe we screw up as a nation from time to time, but it doesn't mean we quit trying. Today is a good day to forgive ourselves for past failings and let ourselves think nobler thoughts for tomorrow.

We can do better. We can be better. We can live up to this symbol, this representation of some really awesome stuff. After all, it's our symbol. We made it. It's what we truly want to be.